Sunday, December 28, 2008

I'm A Toy's 'r' Us Kid (from the future)

Future Boys and Future Girls,
As we move further into the future we approach the inevitable state of being that we so distrust.  Thats right future friends, as we journey forward through time and space we continuously cycle closer and closer to becoming..... GROWN-UPS.  The sad unhealthy state of consciousness that is triggered by the acknowledgment of sexual relations between santa clause and the easter bunny, leading to santa contracting a terminal case of leprosy.  Yes, I know, as we grow older, Santa is slowly dying, while the easter bunny hovers like a jackal over not so jolly saint nick's rotting carcass. 


by taking our vitamins everyday we can stregnthen the covalent bond between us and the cosmos, and by acknowledging the stupidity of grownupness everyday:

Here's my 8 step program to eternal youth!

step1: drop some vitamin tablets in your mouth, and tuck them under your toungue.
step2: gargle with warm salt water
step3: spit out the vitamin salt water mixture into a thermos (to keep proper temp)
step4: motivate yourself with a few positron phrases (i.e. youre a cow, or i love you and i love cheese and cookies, or simply point at yourself and laugh)
step5: reintroduce the vitasaltwater mixture into your mouth
step6: blink
step7: swallow
step8: SMILE LIKE A CHILD! (in the business we call this "smild")

Don't worry future friends: by preserving our youth we are not living in the past, we are merely moving through time as observers of innocence and style.

REMEMBER: like and egg, we are the yolk space is the shell, and time is the increasingly hot frying pan. DON'T GET COOKED!!!

on that note, as some of you may know there's gonna be a huge ragin' party in new brunswick at which some dj's you all are familiar with will be preforming, namely me, dave mos (the mossface killah) zach attack lickstrawwww, zenon from the future, and mike robinson (cheerios).

The idea is to preserve the spirit of the future folk, party our asses off, and in doing so preserve our youth.

The Party's goin down on Thursday January 29 

The date is set but the party itself is still in a developmental stage, and i want all of you morons to get involved and continue the beautiful tradition of partying in the future!

stay young and get involved assholes


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